In the Book of Mormon, there is a record of a family who traveled from the Tower of Babel to the American continent. The family of Jared soon received their first glimpse of a vast, stormy ocean, having been required of the Lord to crawl into some mysterious air-tight vessels they were promised would carry them safely to a better place. As they gazed into the deep, moving water, they breathed the unfamiliar sea salt and felt the ice cold water lap at their feet. "What will become of our family?" "Can we do this thing that God requires of us?"

These were the questions we asked as our family stood on the edge of a new journey in February 2011. Before Cathi was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, we saw the waves of an unfamiliar storm brewing and felt the fear of anticipation. When the cancer was certain, our family was required to wade into the cold water, crawl into a mysterious vessel and trust the Lord would be in charge.

The family of Jared was given stones touched by the finger of the Lord that provided light inside their vessels "that they might not cross the great waters in darkness......and it came to pass that...(they) set forth into the sea, commending themselves unto the Lord their God. And it came to pass that the Lord God caused that there should be a furious wind blow upon the face of the waters, towards the promised land; and thus they were tossed upon the waves of the sea before the wind. And it came to pass that they were many times buried in the depths of the sea, because of the mountain waves which broke upon them, and also the great and terrible tempests which were caused by the fierceness of the wind. And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters. And it came to pass that the wind did never cease to blow towards the promised land while they were upon the waters; and thus they were driven forth before the wind. And they did sing praises unto the Lord; yea, the brother of Jared did sing praises unto the Lord, and he did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord. And thus they were driven forth; and no monster of the sea could break them, neither whale that could mar them; and they did have light continually, whether it was above the water or under the water." Read the rest: http://lds.org/scriptures/bofm/ether/6?lang=eng

This blog is the captain's log of our family's journey. It will serve to keep all of you updated on Cathi's condition but also be a place where I can express the lessons we are learning so that it might be a source of strength for others who are going through difficult challenges. We are certainly not unique in this regard. I hope to continue trusting in the light we have been given and to lead our family when we are encompassed by the dark ocean or tossed by its waves. We sincerely seek for your faith in asking the Lord to calm the water, give strength beyond our own and lead all of us of us to a better place.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Our Silver Wedding Anniversary

(Cathi surprised me this morning by writing this post as part of her gift to me on our anniversary...I also wrote a post about her...this coincidence was NOT planned!)

It was twenty-five years ago today--August 13, 1986--that Jerry and I were married in the Salt Lake LDS Temple. What a wonderful day, being surrounded by many loved ones and looking forward to our lives together! I couldn't imagine being happier than I was that day. Since then, as Jerry and I have lived quite a bit of life together, life has gotten better and better. We've added five wonderful children to our family--Sam, Andrew, Leah, Emma, and William--and we've learned and grown together as we've raised this family. (We're STILL in the process of learning, that's for sure.) We've lived in many places--Provo, UT; Pittsburgh and Philadelphia, PA; Boston, MA; Indianapolis and Bloomington, IN; Houston, TX; and now Castle Rock, CO. We've loved every part of the country that we've lived in and cherish every friend we've made along the way. And we've learned to know and love each other more every day.


As Jerry and I have gone through this cancer journey together during the past six months, I've learned even more about what kind of a guy I'm married to. He's not perfect, but I think he's pretty great. He's helped me through some rather rough times and has been there every step of the way for me. Here are just a few things I'm grateful for:

Jerry has let me know that his love for me is unconditional. I remember taking my bandages off a couple of days after my mastectomy. It was very frightening, both physically and emotionally. I remember getting a bit nauseated during the process and having to sit down for a minute, but we just took it slowly. When the bandages were totally removed and it was time to look in the mirror, it was a bit shocking, but Jerry's first words were, "We're going to be okay." He let me know that he loved me just as much as ever, even though my physical body had changed quite drastically. Now, I've been bald for months and I have just a fraction of my eyebrows (although my eyelashes are still there, for some reason) and my appearance drives me crazy. I'm so ready to grow hair back once again! But Jerry lets me know that I'm fine just as I am and that my baldness has never bothered him in the least. I think he truly means it.


Jerry has helped to make these crazy months of surgeries, recoveries, and the long process of chemo as normal as possible for our family. He's helped keep things clean, orderly, and comfortable, and that has meant a lot to a woman who is a bit of an order freak. He's made sure that the kids have had fun and have had normalcy in their lives, even when I haven't been able to do things with them or take them places. It's been a great blessing for me that our family life has stayed constant, even with this major health challenge.


Jerry has been a listening ear, more than he's ever needed to be in our entire marriage. He's listened, counseled when he's needed to, wiped away plenty of tears, and let me know that rough times don't last. He's helped me develop stronger faith, hope,and trust in the Lord. And oh yes, he's helped me laugh a lot. I can't imagine our marriage and family without lots of laughter. Jerry's quirky sense of humor is one of the main reasons I fell in love with him!


Jerry has let me know that he would do ANYTHING for me, and he has. For example, a couple of weeks ago, as I was going through the roughest few days of my last chemo round, I didn't feel so great. I had been trying to take very little anti-nausea medicine so that I'd avoid the jitters and blurry eyes that drove me crazy in the past. But because of this, my stomach didn't feel so great. I just didn't know what I wanted to eat. Finally, I realized that some KFC mashed potatoes sounded good. (I know, that sounds awfully bland.) Jerry didn't hesitate when I made my request, even though KFC is not at all close to our home. He told me that he'd gladly buy or make anything I wanted, any time of day or night. And I believe he would!


I could go on and on with my "gratitude list" regarding my good husband, but I'd better stop before he dies of embarrassment (or possibly gets a big head). I'm just very grateful for the blessing of having met my best friend in January of 1985, having married him in August of 1986, and having the privilege of spending my whole life with him.


I love you, Jerry! Happy 25th Anniversary!

Cathi
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2 comments:

  1. GeronicaAugust 16, 2011 at 7:59 PM

    Hhhhmmm...who is that teenage boy holding (who I think is) Sam?? Ha ha. Sure love you guys!!

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  2. KelliAugust 28, 2011 at 9:01 PM

    You guys are awesome. Happy 25th! Love you guys!

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