Before flying to Los Angeles for work on Tuesday, I emailed a sister (we refer to each other as brother and sister in our church) asking if she would be so kind to check up on Cathi while I'm away. After seeing my email, she immediately contacted Cathi, cheered her up and said she would drop off her grandkids at their house and fix dinner for our family. Emma had a friend visiting from Texas this past week and Cathi was concerned she wouldn't have enough energy to entertain the girls. Each night, I called Cathi and learned how women in our ward came to the rescue! Tuesday, a sister took the girls all the way to Red Rocks and out to lunch. She then took them home, turned around and took them to the Outlets Mall . . . then came back later to drive them home again. Wednesday, another sister picked up the girls and took them hiking, bummed around the shops down town, then met Cathi for lunch. Thursday, another sister gave up part of her day to take the girls shopping and out to lunch. This same sister had William at her house for three days the prior week, just after Cathi received her treatment. Many, many women have brought us meals, provided transportation and have brought thoughtful gifts to Cathi. They have given their hearts to bless and strengthen our family and I love them for it!
I'm grateful for my mom. I am 48 years old and still need to know Mom loves me and understands what I'm going through. I remember once, when I was about 4 or 5, she held me on our front porch one evening as the sun was sliding behind the trees and mountains. We heard the bark of two large black dogs that lived down the street, two of my biggest fears at the time. The safe feeling of both her soft arms and soft words of comfort she spoke that night has followed me and given me strength to move through new challenges in my life. I don't know if there is anything quite so powerful as the love of a mother. (Yes, the picture above was taken at my wedding reception...I was fifteen!)
I was fortunate to grow up knowing both of my grandmothers. After they were both gone and I had moved away, I missed being in their homes, smelling their cooking and eating their meals. It wasn't until I drove past each of their homes (or area where the home used to be) that I realized it was my grandmothers that I actually missed. After Grandmother Eldredge passed away, I watched my mom and her five sisters (that I adored as a kid)...Aunts Kaye, Linda, Sue, Sherla, and Julie . . . move into a new role as grandmothers to their own families. Each wonderful, strong women who are passing their legacy to a new generation.
Of course there are my sisters . . . Valerie, Amber and Lauri. I've been privileged to see a beautiful transformation in them through the years. Each has grown from a girl I used to play GI Joe and Barbies with or used to tease relentlessly or listen to records and 8-track tapes with in my basement bedroom . . . to wives and caring mothers who serve and sacrifice for their own families.
Last but not least, the woman I know best. I doubt you will ever find a more structured, organized, prepared person than Catherine Van Leuven. Nobody alphabetizes their music CDs or places 8-10 sticky notes on the bathroom mirror with reminders of "things to accomplish" quite like Cathi. Not many husbands come home from work, walk into the closet to change their clothes and realize that all of their shirts are hanging in order of sleeve length . . . again. The greatest, most impossible challenge you could EVER give Cathi would be to take away all of her order, predictability and tidiness . . . and replace it with the mystery, worry and chaos of Cancer. I will never forget the image of this broken woman as she handed me the phone after receiving word of her disease. The world as she knew it, had suddenly disappeared.
Now, five months later, I look at this tired, bald woman with a scratchy voice . . . still able to crack some pretty funny jokes and organize photo albums between napping . . . and I see someone who is determined to run the final lap of this race. The same young married woman whose hair I had just fried with a "do-it-yourself" highlight kit that exclaimed, "Jerry, we are ADULTS now and need to take care of this ourselves" after I suggested we run to my hair stylist aunt at 11:00pm on a Saturday night to fix my mistake. (The picture above was taken shortly after the hair-frying incident.) The very same expectant mother who announced to me that once our first child was born, she would give up teaching and spend all her time being a mother. The exact same mormon lady who sobbed next to me in the car just after accepting a call to be the leader of the women's church organization of our local Houston congregation . . . and then moved forward to give her greatest service.
I don't know what I would do without the strength of good women in my life. Quiet courage and faith that doesn't get much fanfare. Perception of things, insight into people that are way beyond my capacity. A power not so much vying for worldly attention and advancement but something solid that begins way down deep and connects with the heart.
I almost included a clip of Willy Nelson and Julio Iglesias singing, "To All The Girls I've Loved Before" but it somehow didn't seem right. :) Instead, I found the following clip that for me, captures the faith, courage, kindness and strength of many women that mean so much to me. If you have 16 minutes, please watch it . . . it's well worth the time. If you are not mormon, it will give you a pretty good portrayal of what LDS women are all about (although I am privileged to know good women like this everywhere, regardless of their beliefs). If you are a mormon woman, it will remind you that you are part of one of the greatest forces for good in the world today. . . and this guy is one grateful recipient!
