In the Book of Mormon, there is a record of a family who traveled from the Tower of Babel to the American continent. The family of Jared soon received their first glimpse of a vast, stormy ocean, having been required of the Lord to crawl into some mysterious air-tight vessels they were promised would carry them safely to a better place. As they gazed into the deep, moving water, they breathed the unfamiliar sea salt and felt the ice cold water lap at their feet. "What will become of our family?" "Can we do this thing that God requires of us?"

These were the questions we asked as our family stood on the edge of a new journey in February 2011. Before Cathi was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, we saw the waves of an unfamiliar storm brewing and felt the fear of anticipation. When the cancer was certain, our family was required to wade into the cold water, crawl into a mysterious vessel and trust the Lord would be in charge.

The family of Jared was given stones touched by the finger of the Lord that provided light inside their vessels "that they might not cross the great waters in darkness......and it came to pass that...(they) set forth into the sea, commending themselves unto the Lord their God. And it came to pass that the Lord God caused that there should be a furious wind blow upon the face of the waters, towards the promised land; and thus they were tossed upon the waves of the sea before the wind. And it came to pass that they were many times buried in the depths of the sea, because of the mountain waves which broke upon them, and also the great and terrible tempests which were caused by the fierceness of the wind. And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters. And it came to pass that the wind did never cease to blow towards the promised land while they were upon the waters; and thus they were driven forth before the wind. And they did sing praises unto the Lord; yea, the brother of Jared did sing praises unto the Lord, and he did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord. And thus they were driven forth; and no monster of the sea could break them, neither whale that could mar them; and they did have light continually, whether it was above the water or under the water." Read the rest: http://lds.org/scriptures/bofm/ether/6?lang=eng

This blog is the captain's log of our family's journey. It will serve to keep all of you updated on Cathi's condition but also be a place where I can express the lessons we are learning so that it might be a source of strength for others who are going through difficult challenges. We are certainly not unique in this regard. I hope to continue trusting in the light we have been given and to lead our family when we are encompassed by the dark ocean or tossed by its waves. We sincerely seek for your faith in asking the Lord to calm the water, give strength beyond our own and lead all of us of us to a better place.

Friday, March 18, 2011

Cathi Update

Wednesday, Cathi had a full-body PET scan.  This morning, we met with her oncologist to go over the findings of all the tests, including the scan.  We've actually been looking forward to this appointment, thinking we will finally have a clearer perspective about the road ahead of us.  (This is especially true for the woman who alphabetizes our DVDs, fills our bathroom mirror with little "to do" notes for herself, and leads our family in a weekly planning meeting every Sunday.)

Unfortunately, the PET scan raised a concern about potential cancer in the center of Cathi's chest.  However, the oncologist told us that this highlighted image could either be the remains of an infection Cathi had last weekend when one of her drainage tubes became blocked or it could be a benign growth in some of the lymph nodes in that area.  It is uncertain at this point. 

The chemo is now on hold and we will be meeting with a new doctor who specializes in the cardiac-thoracic region of the body.  He will likely schedule a biopsy procedure where he will extract some of this tissue and test it for cancer.  Originally, the appointment wasn't until next Friday, but...after a few hours of watching Cathi struggle with this unexpected turn in the road, we were blessed with a "tender mercy."  We received a call this afternoon moving the appointment up to Monday (in just two days).  There is a slight possibility the procedure could even be done next week so that Cathi can begin her chemo treatment much sooner than we first thought.

Some would call these tender mercies just coincidence.  But I know what they really are.  This afternoon, someone needed to know that she hadn't been forgotten.  That phone call was His way of saying, "Cathi, I'm here."