In the Book of Mormon, there is a record of a family who traveled from the Tower of Babel to the American continent. The family of Jared soon received their first glimpse of a vast, stormy ocean, having been required of the Lord to crawl into some mysterious air-tight vessels they were promised would carry them safely to a better place. As they gazed into the deep, moving water, they breathed the unfamiliar sea salt and felt the ice cold water lap at their feet. "What will become of our family?" "Can we do this thing that God requires of us?"

These were the questions we asked as our family stood on the edge of a new journey in February 2011. Before Cathi was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, we saw the waves of an unfamiliar storm brewing and felt the fear of anticipation. When the cancer was certain, our family was required to wade into the cold water, crawl into a mysterious vessel and trust the Lord would be in charge.

The family of Jared was given stones touched by the finger of the Lord that provided light inside their vessels "that they might not cross the great waters in darkness......and it came to pass that...(they) set forth into the sea, commending themselves unto the Lord their God. And it came to pass that the Lord God caused that there should be a furious wind blow upon the face of the waters, towards the promised land; and thus they were tossed upon the waves of the sea before the wind. And it came to pass that they were many times buried in the depths of the sea, because of the mountain waves which broke upon them, and also the great and terrible tempests which were caused by the fierceness of the wind. And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters. And it came to pass that the wind did never cease to blow towards the promised land while they were upon the waters; and thus they were driven forth before the wind. And they did sing praises unto the Lord; yea, the brother of Jared did sing praises unto the Lord, and he did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord. And thus they were driven forth; and no monster of the sea could break them, neither whale that could mar them; and they did have light continually, whether it was above the water or under the water." Read the rest: http://lds.org/scriptures/bofm/ether/6?lang=eng

This blog is the captain's log of our family's journey. It will serve to keep all of you updated on Cathi's condition but also be a place where I can express the lessons we are learning so that it might be a source of strength for others who are going through difficult challenges. We are certainly not unique in this regard. I hope to continue trusting in the light we have been given and to lead our family when we are encompassed by the dark ocean or tossed by its waves. We sincerely seek for your faith in asking the Lord to calm the water, give strength beyond our own and lead all of us of us to a better place.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Cathi (Initial) Updates

2/12/2011

Hi Family & Friends,

I convinced Cathi to allow me to send this brief message to you. On Monday, Cathi had some testing done and we were told that she has a lump in her breast that is not a cyst and will require a biopsy and ultrasound this coming Monday. We should know the results on Tuesday. It’s been a rough week for Cathi with me being out of town and her alone with her thoughts. We plan to fast tomorrow (Sunday) and invite you to join your prayers with ours to ask that Cathi will be spared having cancer and if not, that our family will be strong through whatever lies ahead. We know there are many of you that are going through difficult challenges and have been great examples for us. We also know that the Lord is in control and find great peace in this knowledge.

I’ll send another message out on Tuesday to let you know what we find out.


2/15/2011

Jerry

Hi Family & Friends,

Thank you SO MUCH for your prayers and faith. We have felt such an outpouring of love and concern from you and can’t begin to express how much peace and comfort this has brought our family. In addition to this support from you, both Cathi and I have felt an almost tangible peace and confidence since Sunday. It was a day full of meetings, callings, and business; but when we woke up on Monday, we woke up with light hearts and a sense of humor. It has continued to be a literal message from the Lord to us that He is in charge. We have known since Monday morning that if Cathi has cancer, it is exactly what the Lord wants us to pass through…no doubts.

Both biopsies confirm that Cathi has invasive ductile carcinoma cancer in her right breast with a grade rating of “high”. The doctor said this rating is much more common in younger women and that we shouldn’t let it make us more concerned. It is NOT indicative of the “stage” of cancer which will not be known until Cathi has surgery. From the tests done so far, it does not appear that the cancer has moved into the lymph nodes…for which we are very grateful. Our next steps are to schedule a breast MRI (which we will try to do in the next 1-2 days) and then to meet with a surgeon. I will be doing a lot of research so Cathi doesn’t have to wade through much on her own. I’m open to any valid information any of you have that you think might be helpful.

In Ether 6, we are told that the family of Jared stood on the shores of a vast ocean before crawling into some new-fangled barges but they “commended themselves unto the Lord.” We are smelling the unfamiliar sea salt and feeling the cold water lap at our feet as we begin this new journey, but know that we will never be without light and that nothing can break us as the waters encompass us. Please continue to keep us in your prayers, the power that comes from this is real. We love you and are so grateful we are all family with a loving Father and Savior guiding our every move.

Jerry


2/22/2011

Hi Everyone,

Just a quick update on Cathi’s medical situation. We met with the surgeon and got the MRI results yesterday morning. We are 95% certain her surgery will be scheduled for Wednesday, March 2nd in the morning.

Cathi's tumor is actually 4.5cm (not 3cm like we thought). She also has another invasive high grade tumor about 2cm away from this one. In the other breast there is a small mass that appears to be cancer but they can't know without another biopsy. Still NO evidence the cancer is in her lymph nodes. We already had made the decision to surgically reduce ALL chances of further breast cancer if any slight sign of cancer showed up in her left breast. Chemo will only be needed if any cancer cells show up in her lymph nodes (which will be examined right after the surgery).

The most important thing you need to know is that since she received a blessing Sunday night that she would "fully recover," we have felt incredible peace of mind. Receiving more negative news yesterday has NOT phased us...rather, we left the surgeon's office lighter than we've felt in many days. Part of it was just getting knowledge and eliminating the mystery, part of it is complete trust in this surgeon (who heads the surgical staff at Littleton Adventist Hospital in Denver), but most of it is our complete faith in the power of the Priesthood and knowing the Lord is in charge. We both KNOW that Cathi will recover, although we may have a rough road ahead of us. Thanks for your continued faith, and prayers in our behalf. The kids, Cathi and I are all very positive and doing great (and Cathi is sleeping at night) as a result! If there is any other significant change or development, I’ll send out another email.

Jerry


2/25/2011

Many of you have asked what you can do to help Cathi. Cathi’s surgery is scheduled for this Wednesday at 10am. She will be staying only one night and coming home on Thursday. Our family will be fasting and praying for her once again this Sunday and invite you to join us if, you can. Thank you so much for your prayers and faith to this point. We’re doing great!

Jerry


Hi Family & Friends,

I spoke to the surgeon and was happy to hear that the surgery went very well. No bleeding or intubation problems like what we experienced with the last surgeries in Houston. Although the pathology report will not be available until Friday or (likely) Monday, the surgeon stated that the two lymph nodes she removed did test positive for cancer. So she removed several more and said we will need to wait to hear the actual stage of cancer in a few days. Cathi and I have discussed this possibility and already had made a decision for her to go through chemotherapy, regardless if cancer was discovered in her lymph nodes or not…so we move onto our next step! I’ll send more information out as I learn anything significant. Thanks again for all your love, faith and prayers…keep them coming!

Many of you have asked if we’ve shared this information with our son Andrew, who is serving his mission in the Dominican Republic. We have not. We need to discuss this more and seek inspiration on the timing. He wrote me today and he is, without doubt, enjoying the best part of his mission so far. He even stated, “I love you guys and miss home, but if I had the opportunity to come home now, I would turn it down.” So if any of you are writing to Andrew at this time, please keep in mind that, at least for now, he has no knowledge of this challenge in our family.

We love you all and are SO grateful for all the wonderful support we feel. Cathi was just wheeled into the room and I told her about the cancer in her lymph nodes. SHE comforted ME by not acting surprised and being her practical self saying, “we’ll just move forward.” So, for those of you feeling any drama in all of this, don’t. We are just being blessed with an opportunity to put in practice the faith we’ve proclaimed all of our lives...and being so blessed by our increased connection with YOU.

Jerry

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